I’m sick of it all.

Dear readers it’s not Thursday but I wanted to write an extra blog post mainly to express how I’m feeling at the moment.

Since becoming ill with Covid 19 in March my life has changed so much. Its even changed the way that I look.

I don’t recognise myself anymore.

I don’t have an income to speak of and I’m struggling with everything.

Every month the bills roll in and I know that I can’t afford to pay them.

I’m now dependent upon foodbank food. Sometimes they’ll be some fruit and vegetables in the bags.

I’m so grateful for them but at the same time I’m totally ashamed of myself for having to depend upon them for help.

I and thousands others haven’t been shopping in a supermarket for months. Going shopping for anything is a dream now.

My health isn’t brilliant although I’m better than I was.

This week’s been a bad long covid week because I’m recovering from another bout of pleurisy.

Thanks for that Covid 19.

I really don’t know how long that I can continue to live like this. It’s depressing to say the least.

Everything that I used to take for granted has now gone. If I want to do simple tasks I have to prepare myself for it.

I can’t go to places because A, I’m very wary of catching Covid 19 again and B I haven’t the means to do so.

I know that this is depressing but it’s how it is.

I don’t want to have to rely upon foodbanks etc but I have to.

This government have well and truly screwed us all over.

You see Covid 19 and long covid has caused immense suffering for so many people.

It’s not just about health, its our whole life’s.

I want to be a better person, I want to get back to normal and be outside the Jobcentre again to help people I really do.

I’m hoping that my health will return ASAP.

I’m so sorry for ranting, but I needed to express myself. I’ll be ok, I’ll manage, but it’s not easy.

I’ll be plodding on as I usually do, but a bit of good fortune would be good.

I’m thinking about everyone that are also suffering, we can do this we really can.

As for myself I’ll take it day by day, hoping that tomorrow will be better.

Thank you so much for reading this and for supporting my blog. It means the world to me.

I shall be publishing Thursdays blog as usual.

7 thoughts on “I’m sick of it all.”

  1. Hi again Charlotte I’m sorry you are having such a truly shit time. I can identify I am in similar state battling eye and mouth infections currently laid in bed in SILs house. I could go on but there’s thousands living nightmare lives but it’s mot thousands stotiesit’s one story thousands of times 😭 I can’t proof read coz of eye. You are doing so well I’m horrendous circumstances ❤️❤️❤️

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  2. I’m so sorry to hear of your continuing struggles Charlotte, financial, physical and most likely mental ones as well, understandably.

    You’re doing amazingly well considering what you’re going through and your strength of character radiates from your posts. I pray that the hard misfortune’s that you are living with are evicted from your life very very soon.

    I’m sending you love, respect and solidarity along with a token gift for your wonderful blog posts and in appreciation for everything you do helping others.

    Enjoy the rest of the weekend, stay strong and be safe.

    Steve R.
    X

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  3. Dear Charlotte, please do NOT feel ashamed of using foodbanks, it’s not your fault, either the illness or the poverty, you are going through hard times but you are certainly not alone in that. Foodbanks are there to help, many of us who volunteer are struggling ourselves too. It shouldn’t be this way I know, but hopefully things will eventually improve when the virus is defeated and the Tories are kicked out. Hang on in there. I’ll be thinking of you and sending you some positive vibes on the astral plane.

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